Don't change, grow

When you look in a mirror, what is the first thing you see? Do you see the beauteous existence that is who you are or does the smallest blemish distract you?

Sometimes in our lives, we get distracted by the small things that we don't like about ourselves. We put our focus and energy into covering up and hiding these "flaws". Trying to change who we are so that we can fit better into the "normal", "ideal", and "perfect” ways of living.

In my life, I have been guiltier of this than I would like to admit. Trying to have the perfect hair, clothes, skin, personality, life style. I started to become a person who thought that I deserved to have the best no matter what the cost. But there was always a catch, no matter how hard I tried, there was always something that stood in the way of me becoming this "ideal" person. But in trying to fit in and be “perfect", I realized that I wasn't doing myself any favors. I lost parts of me that I loved, my happiness, my creativity, my originality; all things that I would need to help me now as I'm growing older. I don't want to lose out on who I am as a result of trying to be who others may want me to be. Granted there are probably always things that I would like to change about myself, but I've decided to give myself a new focus. Rather than trying to change my appearance and losing my personality in the process, I challenge myself to improve my personality.

Don't change who you are, rather work to grow into the person you want to be.

We are never too old to learn. That is why, as I made a list of reasons why I wanted to study abroad, I tried to focus on lessons that I could use for personal growth rather than just on things that I wanted to change about my life.

1) I want to strengthen my independence.

For some people who know me, this probably sounds like the most ludicrous reason for me to travel. I am a very stubbornly independent person, sometimes to the point where it gets me into trouble. But I believe that is why I chose this as one of my reasons to study abroad. I need to learn to tame my independence, I believe that the best way is to test it in a way that forces me to see just how strong I can be on my own, surrounded by a completely different environment.

2) I want to expand my comfort zone.

Being the shy and quiet person I am, often times I end up passing and missing out on opportunities that challenge my limits. I don't push myself enough to see just how open-minded and flexible I can truly be. By pushing myself into exploring another culture, I will be able to

3) Work on my language skills.

In my last post, I had mentioned a 5 year resolution that I had made, upon review, I realized I never shared the goal I wrote.  Part of this resolution, was that I wanted to be able to speak, at least a basic conversation, in 5 different languages (English not included) before I graduated.

4) To see the World. 

I have always dreamed of being a world traveler. Most times to the extent that my mother or one of my best friends has to pull me back into the reality in which I am actually living. I find a great deal of intrigue in the thoughts of how differently and yet similarly others can live. This made my list, not because it’s somewhere where I can grow or learn, but because this is a part of me, my fascinations, that I never want to lose.

5) Meet new People.

I love my family, I love my friends, and I love that they are there for me 24/7. They have all influenced my life in more ways than I could even imagine. But I have also realized, that surrounding myself with the same people constantly, leads to the often unrealized exchange of personality traits. Sometimes, this can be a fabulous thing, but it can also lead to losing out of who I really am. By surrounding myself with new people and their ideas, while still staying connected to those at home, the real I will have greater chance of being established.

6) See the different styles of Art, Music, and Food.

New styles of how life is presented through different mediums is amazing. How simple things like a pencil, a pitch, or even a dish can change how people view a situation can be mind-blowing. I consider myself to be an artist but often I struggle with finding creative ways to express ideas. By going to a place with an extremely rich artistic culture, I hope to open my eyes to new perceptions and better appreciation for the arts and artists themselves.

7) Find the Thrill of Travel.

"Focus on the journey, not the destination. Joy is found not in finishing an activity but in doing it."

-Greg Anderson

This reason, is focused on finding the joy in the small things, like the chance to ride in an airplane or use the metro (something we don't have around where I live). Being able to find adventure in the small and often "routine" things that happen when traveling, that are sometimes taken for-granted even though they aren't part of life on a daily basis.

8) Appreciate Diversity.

Small town Midwestern USA doesn't often offer a wide variety when it comes to the types of people living there, so again, I'm going to focus on the "broadening horizons" and "different views" part of traveling. I want to learn how to embrace the diverse array of heritage and cultures that will be surrounding me while abroad.

9) See a foreign education system in action

This may sound like an extremely dorky reason to consider traveling abroad. However, this is one thing that I find fascinating. The idea that there is no unified global standard for how to teach or what we as humans need to learn; and because of this, each country/city/school has something that makes it different from the rest.

10) To help my Future Self 

We've probably all the spiel about how we need to build up a great resume, find a good career, and contribute our best to the society in which we live. But I'm sorry to say that when I look towards my future, I don't focus on the idea of having to plan out my career. To my brain, my future is a place where I should have few regrets. Granted, that sometimes leaves my priorities a bit jumbled, but it gets me to act rather than to always just sit and ponder about how things could have been. This point is my personal challenge in a nutshell. I want to learn and grow by doing the things that I believe will help improve and not change who I am. To me, this is the best way to help my future self.